


! I CAN'T DO IT !

by idfkfangirl



Series: the moonjumper x reader collection [1]
Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:41:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24900103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idfkfangirl/pseuds/idfkfangirl
Summary: - | a moonjumper x reader | -The time is growing closer and closer, yet they hadn't found what they were looking for. Maybe they were right from the start, ever since they were young. But sometimes... one can be proven wrong from the weirdest of people. Or rather, something completely different from people, which is probably better.
Relationships: Moonjumper (A Hat in Time)/Reader
Series: the moonjumper x reader collection [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1801771
Kudos: 19





	! I CAN'T DO IT !

An eternity.

Yeah, that's what it felt like. It's been years since they've visited this spot, to the point where they couldn't remember when they had last come here; and it nonetheless continues to make them feel comforted in some odd way.

They couldn't point their finger on it, but maybe it was the nostalgia of the innocent days, when they were younger. When they would wander off without anyone noticing and come here, to their secret hideout that none could find.

Or maybe it was due to their job, that wouldn't dare compete with nature. Even if they did, to a degree, like spending their time in their comfort of a home, Y/n still enjoyed the outdoors. It didn't smell anywhere close to

Even if they did enjoy what they did, they'd rather spend it all outside, even if they did find major comfort within the comfort of their own home. It smelled... fresher outside, fresher than the inside of their own home. Just the simple, natural scent that comes from the combination of oxygen combined with all that surrounded them.

Plenty of mothers' air could be obtained by the occupied Y/n's left and right. There were thousands of them, all aligned on their left and right in a row on both sides, the rows of them being a few feet away from the river that the observer sat above thanks to an old, yet somewhat stable stone bridge. Its color, grey, complimented well with what occurred each day. The sun would grow tired of keeping itself up, and slowly descend to take a break for the day, allowing a rock full of many holes to take its place for the night. And all while that happened, the river would glisten even brighter than it did before, a variety of colors filling its rushing waters as colors other than the typical blue or black filled the upcoming night sky.

It'd be silent. Only the busy stream, dancing leaves, and greeting wind would fill Y/n's ears to accompany the lonesome silence as they admired the beautiful sight. Something that the human that dangled their feet above the running water, treasured more than anything they had experienced.

Even though they did feel over the top grateful when it came to the job that they've always wanted, something about this place, the nature all around them, made them feel overwhelmed with inner peace.

In a sense, they were already at inner peace with themselves, hence why they took a break from the job that they could refrain from doing whenever they wanted too for an entire month. That was until they were offered something that they couldn't refuse, but still regretted accepting in the first place. When they thought about it, it did have a hundred percent chance of getting them more attention; though, they already had some, but not anywhere close to what was deemed as popular.

Y/n let out a wavered sigh as their mind drifted off towards the subject of their newfound, obstacle of a mission. They only could wish until the dawn of the final day that they listened to their practically screaming brain, that told them to reject it with its frantic shouts of 'NO'. But of course, they just had to reply with an assured,'sure' in response to the email. Their teeth began tugging at their bottom lip, as their thoughts were filled with hopes of them surviving long enough to even put out what was requested of them before due time.

It depends on their choice before the last day of the month hits on when it comes down to what they end up choosing. Their promise or their dream.

Why do they feel so cold? They shouldn't feel this cold either and yet they did, they had more than a clue on the two questions, one not needing to be said. The question on the outside was quickly answered when they instantly noticed the drizzle; and it was just by looking at the tiny puddles that appeared in the water below their feet, along with the light liquid that had begun sliding off their skin softly.

Y/n looked up at the sky.

'If anyone were me, would they think differently of this month if they knew what it was?' no one but them, whoever knew what was inside their head, would know what would occur this month.

That's okay.

They'll find a way.

Until they find what they're looking for, no one can stop them otherwise, they'll make sure they pick the right choice.

It's their personal secret hidden to the world they were born in, only nature could know of the motives if they chose one of the options, and she couldn't stop them. That's what Y/n hated the most.

Now that they thought about it, they shouldn't even be thinking about this now, they had come here to release their growing stress that randomly appeared throughout almost every day of their life since the beginning of this year. And now it was July, and they were still thinking about it when they shouldn't be.

A frown appeared on the thinking person's face, they didn't notice.

Their hands began gripping the rock harder than before, not for balance, but just to feel if anything had changed. Anything besides the age that bestowed onto it, even though it wasn't human. Nope, it felt the exact same way it did all those years ago, the spaces were still shut tight together and remained stable to an extent, even throughout all the passing years seasons somehow.

It reminded Y/n of themselves, but they shook it off.

Passing by yet greeting them with silence was a cool breeze, quickly fading away to go somewhere else. The observer sighed as they leaned themselves forward, looking down at themselves through the water, thinking of how much prettier they were in it compared to their mirror back home.

Nothing but them, the lowering sun, and the slowly rising amazement that they felt as a child that occurred within them now, and none of it bothered them like their emotions did around others.

One thing they'd go back on most is their memories of this, it was something they often memorized when it came to this event, down to the smallest of details; even as a child. And it'd never cease to amaze them.

The darkening sky, the colors to behold that graced the possible night sky, it never disappointed them and always surprised them when they prayed for it to happen.

They personally enjoyed this more than the bright blue sky, as they felt the same with the void filled sky, they'd prefer this over anything else. It never disappointed them. Even if they had thought, and described this before, they'd always do it again and again by heart.

A vicious, burning sun would allow the people of earth to rest, visiting the other side to show itself off and awake those who need to get up. While it lowered itself, hues would unfold onto the typical sky and bless those who see its charm.

Oh, how they loved it. How it swept up all their thoughts and distracted them completely with its never ending beauty.

Even if a smile would appear for a second or with a chance, more, it never failed to make them smile either way. It'd never not make them happy once they thought about it, although, they couldn't understand why. Maybe it was their love for sudden occurrences, and how they were usually right on what days a sunset would behold their eyes. Or maybe it was just because of the perfect spot to view all the shades from where they sat, a view that no one else would have if they hadn't explored off and away from the warmth of their residence.

As long as they continued and went on with enjoying themselves no matter how many times the event repeated itself before their eyes, it didn't matter to them.

Their legs swung lightly, obviously hesitating with hitting the bridge as it stopped when it hit too close to home and persisted after repetitively; going back to reading off their memories from decades ago once more. This was their first time coming here in years, especially without someone with them.

And as they went on in their head, a look of peace adorned their face as they reeled back their once stressed thoughts and put them in the back of their mind.

Not minding if this was in fact another tiny moment of theirs, they loved to keep these to themselves and hold onto them forever, peaceful moments, with nothing to bother them like the constant smell of food or sometimes constant, young singing.

Nothing that had to do with people or loud noises.

If they didn't have a job, they'd probably die here from how long they'd just sit here, they even considered staying here and going back home whenever during the month filled break. To become one, or to just be around what made them most happy in life.

There were many things waiting to be done at home. Y/n didn't see a point in it all though: in learning how to cook, how to properly do things such as take care of themselves, or anything of the sort. Actually, they were relatively happy with that, it didn't bother them whatsoever.

The only thing that bothered them, was when they looked out the window that resided inside their room, and the sky would be crying.

They would always wander onto what they wanted.

A friend.

Maybe someone who wouldn't leave them.

And someone they could have a genuine, healthy relationship with.

How about someone who'd stay by their side and help them with their problems, as Y/n, in turn, would do the same.

Someone who'd reassure them over the fact that everything is actually okay, and that they won't be alone until the day they day; the day they're thrown into a hole to forever be forgotten by the world.

One who'd hang around with them, laugh together with, and play random games with them. And... teach them. Teach them how there's more to life rather than working, sleeping, repeat, something different than the pattern they're used to doing alone.

Y/n crossed their arms, the two going across one another to form an x position, as one would do if they were freezing cold and yearned for warmth. Except, instead of yearning for the warmth that one would desire, the nature lover desired touch.

To be hugged, to be held... to be cuddled for the first time.

Y/n shivered slightly at the thought of being alone like this forever. Even if they did, in fact, enjoy being alone, it didn't mean they wanted to all the time such as now.

Wouldn't it be nice to show someone a spot such as this, and just chat or sit in peaceful silence with them, and watch the nature that surrounded them both together? Instead of alone? Just like the old days?

They shook off their thoughts; the tightened grip on their arm had increased with each painful thought brought them way back as they brought themselves back ahead of time before they could go any further.

"But I'm too afraid..." they mumbled on to no one else besides themself.

They were too afraid, because of their supposedly dumb experiances; they were too frightneded to make a move for friendship. Worried of being judged for who they are without much of a reason, for people to only use them for money or laughs. For the same thing, over and over again. Just because of a single experience.

It was dumb and ironic considering that they loved being alone, yet that was all they could wish for, a genuine friend. Someone who'd care about them for more than just an hour.

One who'd treat them like a normal, living, breathing, human being even if they found out who they were.

Wavering out a shaky sigh, Y/n released the grip on their choking arms, placing them down to the side to grip the grey stone they sat atop of instead.

They really did need more things to distract themselves with, but they couldn't think of anything that wouldn't get bombarded.

When things like this happened back then, they always waited.

They had always come to this spot.

To have their head clear, that's why they came here in the first place. Why're they thinking about ridiculous things again? Wasn't their whole, entire point of coming here to not do that in the first place; and yet here they are, ruining the point just from thinking when they should be focused on the sunset above them.

Suddenly, their eyes briskly exchanged upwards. Their usually half lidded eyes lit up, a twinkle appearing then disappearing, something a child would do when given something special. A hesitating smile fought to rise on their face and somewhat won, as a small one appeared instead of the attempted large one.

They were such a child, why would they get excited at such a thing? Wasn't it stupid that something as simple as a sunset would brighten them up completely? Their thoughts brought their once sparking happiness down immediately, a content look still remained on their face, including their small, almost visible smile.

Not averting their eyes for a second, they realised that it'd soon die down. Things such as this don't last as long as the sun does, despite it being created by the very thing that earth's rotated around for years nonstop. Y/n could already see the sun lowering itself more, and they'd rather get home before it gets darker than need be.

With a sigh, they shrugged to themselves, a quick idea, well, reminder popping into their mind.

Before they left, they had to do one more thing.

Having turned their body swiftly yet carefully and plopping their feet down onto the bridges' section that was meant to be walked on, they turned their head around to the pathway home, and back upwards, above.

Only to see nothing.

They leaned their back a bit, crossing their arms with one of their hands formed into a finger gun, the two fingers propping themselves under their head into a thinking position while looking up to their right. Y/n pondered on with what they should wish for, only to think of nothing. Besides the same thing over and over, of course. Of course it had to be the same thing they had always hoped for when they were a kid. Just like all those years ago, they haven't changed have they?

Sighing for the thousandth time but this time in annoyance,"I wish..." god this was so stupid, so childish. And yet the hope was still there.

Their mind held onto the same thing as usual, even after all these years. The now half lidded eyed human closed their eyes, wondering why they still wished up at the colorful sky instead of at a shooting star, maybe then it would work. If only they had the patience to wait for such a thing.

Y/n's arms crossed onto the stones upper part, the part that they had once sat on as their head laid atop their covered flesh, their eyes going up towards the sky and closing once they saw their favorite hue beginning to disappear.

Even if the reason was in hopes of someone hearing them, and actually becoming their,

"Friend, I just want a friend." they would still desperately plead, their words muffled from the cloth of the hoodie they had brought in case of changing weather.

They sat themselves back up, focusing on the fact that they needed to get home before the sunset's entirely gone and the sky is a voidless filled nothing.

Turning themselves around once more, they pulled their hood up, allowing the appearing quick paced drops to hit their covered head to prevent themselves from getting drenched. How odd it was for it to have started raining without warning, the second they had started going home too.

How pathetic could they be to wish for such a repetitive thought thing. Let alone go along with what they did a long, long time ago. How'd they do two things at once without hurting the other if they gained a friend? Then again, they couldn't help themselves, it was the only thing they had hoped for besides one other, already to be fulfilled.

And if it comes true?

They wouldn't know on how that'd go, they'd have to find out the path to go down in the future. It's highly likely for it not to do so anyway, they've done this countless times such as when they were nothing but an innocent, young kid.

They inhaled the air around them again, as if they would never come back again, to have the scent of fresh water combined with the many plants that surrounded them fill their nose.

More thoughts made an attempt to invade their head as they turned back around, ready to head down the road towards home. All they could wish for now was utter silence, seems as though it's not ever gonna happen though.

And with their head hung low, looking down at the ground to think of what they said, they headed on down the now puddle filled road home. Ready to sleep away the day as usual.

Despite the aggravating memories, they'll still keep coming back.

No matter what.


End file.
